The primary election has succeeded in doing its job, whittling down the number of candidates in each party to one. Now Chugiak-Eagle River residents, having helped to settle the in-house friction in the U.S. Senate race, can choose the party platform that best matches their own principles.

Republican?

Up until recently, the answer was a resounding yes. However, independent Alaskans who live on the three H's - hard work, humility and honesty - are becoming increasingly uncomfortable supporting a party that, thanks to some bad apples, is becoming synonymous with greed, arrogance and corruption. It's the inevitable result of retaining too much power for too long. In Lisa Murkowski's case, add to that nepotism.

Democratic?

Of course not - especially in independent-minded Chugiak-Eagle River. Though the solution to winning in Alaska seems to be clear, the Democrats - even the relatively moderate Tony Knowles - cannot seem to shake the two main stigmas that continue to keep his party in the losers' bracket: big government and bleeding heart.

Alas, like the presidential campaign, the Alaska senatorial campaign is not about whom to vote for, but whom to vote against.

But wait. There are other choices. Perhaps one of them combines the best traits of the two major parties while leaving out the worst traits.

Green?

Yes - when Alaska becomes North Dakota. In other words, the browning of Alaska via climate change aided by short-sighted developers and fossil-fuel extractors will one day convince Alaskans to stop pooh-poohing the "G" word, but probably not in this century, let alone by Nov. 2.

Alaskan Independence Party?

Now we're getting close. This party features many of the Republican's best traits - pro-gun, anti-tax and, of course, independence - while holding the three H's high on their platform. Problem is, it may be too high. Their anti-socialism is a bit extreme even for most Alaskans, who believe government must play some role in their lives - just not the lead role.

Libertarian?

Hmmmm. Pro-gun, anti-tax platform. Very much against government intrusion while at the same time for more police, especially to protect private property. Indeed, "private" is the key word in defining libertarianism. Their live-and-let-live platform is based on the three Hs, but they don't judge others so much: "We don't care how you do it, just don't tell us how to do it." Sounds Alaskan.

Problem is, instead of convincing Alaskans that they feature the best traits of all other parties, state Libertarian leaders seem to be more concerned these days about beating their anti-military draft drum. While a true Libertarian believes first and foremost that you, not the government, own your body, it's also true that many Alaskans are off fighting a war in Iraq, and their friends and loved ones might not be in the mood to dance to that drum beat right now.

So, Alaskans are still left with the task of choosing the least of all evils.

The good news is that we get to choose.

We catch the biggest fish, too

Not only are Chugiak-Eagle River folks smarter, wealthier, stronger, faster, kinder, gentler and, above all, more modest than our big-city cousins in Anchorage, but we're better anglers, too.

But seriously, congrats to Eagle River's Travis Robertson, who won the $3,000 in the Anchorage Silver Salmon Derby, and to local angler Renee James, who landed the big one in the $10,000 Seward Silver Salmon Derby.

- Tony Bickert

This article published in The Alaska Star on Friday, August 27, 2004.